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I watch an imaginary world-

I live outside of-

Yet I dream within it.

I tunnel through its center-

Searching for your heart.

Wishing

Hoping

To become a part of that world.

Still looking in.

Eyes are like mirrors-

Reflecting what’s true

I’ve seen the flicker of an image

I knew long ago

One thousand lonely lifetimes 

I wait and go on-

The mirror reflects an image 

Lost in my mind

Yet, I grasp for one last look

A feeling

A vibration

The chills up my spine

It’s vague- a sense overtakes me

A reflection 

Yet, nothing is there

Beauty behind emptiness-

I fade

Behind the shadow you left.

I hope the rain stops soon

I want to see the sunshine again.

I want to see my fur flowing in the wind.

I want to see the light in your eyes

The sun filled days when I still could purr.

I don’t want to hide 

It’s been too long…I’ve been hiding behind these four walls.

I’m sick of shelter- I want to roam free

To explore a new path.

I live in fear with every breath I take

You stand six feet away

I’m afraid of you now.

2020 comes.

My dreams are on hold.

I don’t dare venture out

Out from this shallow hole of fear and uncertainty

Yet, I ache for a new day.

Where 2020 fades like a lost memory.

2020-you have filled my heart with so much rain.

I have no where to go.

No one to see.

You say I can’t move

You say I can’t breathe

But I am still here

Looking you in the eyes

And, never again will I be bullied by your threats and your arrogance!

2020- I walk alone.

How dare you take away everything I’ve known!

Everyone I’ve held dear.

This rain carries the purge

Of the good and the bad

The lost and the found

But deep inside, I just hide..in hopes it will wear itself out.

So… I can slip by.

And, go my own way.

2020- I am just a cat.

I have a right to be a cat.

Why do you insist on taking away my purr?

Always to and fro

The things I see

She doesn’t

Feel the warmth

Of sitting still

Time is a variable

For us to use

As we will

Sit still

Feel the warmth

Of the light

Focus on nothing

And you will find yourself

I know I won’t live forever

The best I can do is be the greatest version of myself today

The me of yesterday you will never see again-

The future fades with all glimpses of uncertainty

There may not be a “me” tomorrow.

Shine now

Shine in my eyes-

I see you now- right now.

Where my dream lives on.

The nightly trek

Wandering nowhere

I know him

every night

He walks alone

Yet, he’s not alone

I follow…

We all walk a path

We can only find ourselves

When we are alone

It is a hunt….

Not for prey

It is the hunt

To find yourself

I’ve walked this path

Many times

I follow….I hunt

To find fellowship

Everything in life is hard

It’s not enough to understand oneself

But more to learn from our elders

And understand one outside oneself

You taught me some hard lessons

Bruised and beaten I’m willing now

I see you. I know you. I understand.

 I am ready.

Contemplating my life-

I see-

I am no more than another coconut.

My purpose was to be free-

Yet, I choose to to live in comfort.

Secure from the rain.

A comforting bowl of food awaits me.

It deviates my mission.

My quest for adventure-

My quest for fame-

My desire to find the avenue behind the sun.

My worthless moments 

When I let you put me down-

And, I believed it!

I can’t believe how I’ve moved past that now

Being caged and imprisoned –

Like an animal

I had no hope- no light

No life!

There was no me!

I release your footprint on my soul!

I am now free

To be the best of me.

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